Driver's Ed

I got back from Freetown yesterday, a trip during which I experienced many different types of transportation. This, coupled with my traveling experiences over the last year and a half, have led me to my own classification system for driving styles. In order to fully understand, you have to first understand that many of the roads we travel on are either rough dirt roads, broken up pavement, or extremely congested city traffic. The classifications are as follows:
1. The "grass-is-greener" approach.
This driver begins with the very best of intentions...on his own side of the road. But then he begins to notice that while his side is full of potholes, the other side does not appear to have nearly as many. So, he switches to the other side. Logical...except that once he is there, he begins to notice that now the other side of the road has less potholes than before, so...as any good driver would do... he switches back again...and again... and again... ad nauseaum... LITERALLY.
2. The "Looney Tunes" school of thought.
This method is fairly straight forward. You just pretend that you are in a cartoon, get up a lot of speed and figure that, like the cartoon characters who run off of the edge of the cliff and just keep going, you also will just have SO much momentum, that you will fly over the top of the pothole, and not experience the inevitable drop until you have reached the other side of the pothole. The trick is to just keep going fast enough. This approach is very similar to the Evil Keneville (sp?) approach. The difference is that the Evil Keneeville driver is at least aware of the jarring jolt you get to your spine... he just doesn't care. He views it as a necessary evil in order to soar over the next 5 potholes to a new world record. After all, one bump is better than 5...right.
3. The "Secret Treasure Map" approach.
I think that this type of driver has probably seen too many pirate movies, or Indiana Jones movies. He truly believes that, if one tries hard enough, there is actually a way to pass through the maze of concrete swiss cheese... unscathed. So, he seeks to find the exact sequence of left and right turns, swerving sharply from one side to the next, seeking to prevent any discomfort to his passengers. There are two problems with this theory... the goose eggs that each passenger gets from alternately knocking his head on his window and the head of the passenger next to him... and the ONCOMING TRAFFIC!!!!
4. The "007 - Licensed to Kill" driver.
This driver is legitimately appalled at the careless and risky driving of those around him and will talk at great length ( in words I can't repeat on this blog) about their foolishness and carelessness. He, however, will take the same risks...and worse. According to him, that is okay because he is actually SO skilled in his driving that he can come within centimeters of oncoming traffic as he passes another car at a very high speed, without any problem whatsoever. The only reason that his passengers and the other driver are upset about this... is because they are just ignorant of how truly skilled he is. He is so skilled that such behavior is actually not a risk for him. So, he just informs them, in no uncertain terms (again, unrepeatable) that they are silly for being afraid and ignorant.
5. The "Tortoise and the Hare" approach.
Being the Tortoise AND the Hare is very tricky business, but it does allow the driver to slow down enough to soften impact for each pothole...He just makes up for it in between with crazy high speeds. On the upside... you have frequent brake checks... on the down side...you have frequent brake replacements....and frequent visits to your chiropractor...that is, if there WERE one.

All drivers operate on the basic understanding of a few simple unwritten rules:
1. Lanes are optional
2. It is okay to not have brakes, mirrors, headlights, or a seatbelt...but a horn is a necessity.
3. Wherever you are going, get there as fast as you can.
4. 1st and 2nd gear are to be used only in absolute emergencies.
5. All written rules are for every one else.
6. If anyone is in front of you, they should get out of the way.

All that being said... Buckle up and enjoy the ride.

P.S. on the Baby Boy

I was able to weigh Kunku's baby...at about 9 lbs! WOW! Mom and baby are both doing well.